CUPS 52: Emotional Badass

When my son was born, the first night we spent at home, I was up most of the night terrified about the inconsequential slant to the bassinet mattress. I was thoroughly convinced that he was going to roll onto his stomach in the middle of the night, as a 4-day old, and suffocate himself. This was a complete and utter joke of a thought, but at the time I was this close to getting out a construction leveler and straight up shaving off portions of the mattress until it was at an exact zero degree slant. I think I have a tendency to dwell on things that don’t actually matter, and when I suddenly had a 4-day old I actually legit slipped into a short-term insanity that took me about a year to come out of. In short, nobody should have babies ever, because things would be so much easier and we’d all be so much better adjusted.

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CUPS 51: Freakout

Welcome to a series of strips were two people panic about having a baby. I hope I’m appealing to a sizable enough group of people, seeing as like a billion people have children every year, and God knows how many of them freak out about it.

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CUPS 50: Opening Night

CUPS stadium will from here on out be referred to ‘Dr. Pepper Stadium at CUPS confines‘, and we’ll all be wearing ‘Comcast’ patches on our left sleeves. The post-game show will no longer be referred to as ‘CUPS Tonight‘, but instead will be referred to as ‘CUPS Tonight, delivered by Dominos Pizza‘. Also, if you’ve got the chance, do your best to work Coors Light into any post-game interviews. I mean, it’s not vital, but with Coors Light being the official beer of CUPS, it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world to try and kick ’em a little bit of extra exposure when we can. Rick ‘Taco Bell’ McNamara OUT.

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CUPS 44: No Excuses

Lester and Norah considered going with PMS 360, but realized quickly that it was way too bold of a color. Then they shortly considered PMS Cool Gray 4C, and while it’s certainly subdued enough, they ultimately decided that it was too drab for a young child. They also went through a quick metallics phase where they considered PMS 871, 872 and 874, but of course they didn’t want their child growing up in a room that looked like some sort of bomb shelter. I think they made the right decision with the 277. Colorful enough to be interesting, not too loud to bug the baby. Good call, Josephs.

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CUPS 42: Makin’ Soup

Did you know that gambling on tennis is absolutely HUGE internationally? Your first thought when I say this is surely ‘wtf, that can’t possibly be true’, but it is! Apparently it’s because tennis matches are going on almost literally at every second of every day everywhere. Like, there are tournaments going on every weekend, and it’s something that a TON of people are wagering money on. Certainly surprised me when I found this out in passing that one time that may or may not have actually happened.

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