Hello, yes, 911? I’d like to file a report? There’s some guy loudly talking to himself outside my house… Um, no, he doesn’t appear to be dangerous, but he’s… It’s loud, you know? It’s really weird. Like, who does that? He’s more or less performing a internal monologue externally, as if he’s in some sort of a Shakespeare performance or something like that. Using old English, as well. Oh, actually, you know what? It is a play. I forgot. They’re doing Shakespeare in the park tonight, and my house is adjacent to the local park. That explains the large audience sitting there as well. Sheesh, 911, is my face red. Go ahead and carry on with your evening!
